Hello readers! I've missed a few of our monthly blogs, but now I'm back feeling refreshed with new things to discuss with you all. One celebrity that I truly admire is Tracee Ellis Ross. In one of her interviews, she talked about how oftentimes (despite all of her accomplishments) she is treated as if she has failed in life due to the fact that she currently neither has a partner or children. Her response really stuck with me because she talked about how she doesn't measure "success" based on how society views it. She takes autonomy over her life by deciding what a fulfilling life truly looks like. The part that stood out to me the most in this interview was that she said her life is fulfilling because of the promises that she not only maintains for others, but also because she keeps her promises to herself (Timestamp: 9:30 - 10:00).
This interview caused me to ask myself this question: "Do I keep my promises to myself?" . Well, the short answer is no. All of my life, I based my self value on how well I serve others. I've learned that one of my biggest gifts is the gift of empathy, but for some reason showing empathy to myself has been one of my biggest battles.
I've measured how worthy I feel based on accomplishments and things while allowing my sense of self to plummet over the years. There have been so many commitments to myself that I've picked up and put down. Simple things like drinking a certain amount of water daily, actually getting enough sleep, keeping up with a self care routine, and even going after certain goals. Failing to keep these commitments to myself while prioritizing other things has only hindered my growth. Although on the outside I was checking things off of my list, it left me feeling empty.
Step 1: Change Your Mindset
Now that I am fully self aware of where I fall short, I'm making the conscious effort to change it. How? Well, first it starts with the mindset, as does almost everything. I'm putting an end to diminishing the value of showing up for myself because it's just as important if not more important than any other thing. I wanted to share a few of the devotionals that I've been reading that has helped with shifting how I think. You can find the following plans on the Bible app!
Step 2: Stop The Excuses & Start Small
The next step is to put things into action. I've eliminated the excuses, and I've started building micro habits that will help me get to my ultimate goal. By taking small steps and mastering those first, I've been able to achieve more of the things that I've been desiring. I've realized that when I try to make huge sudden changes, it feels more like a punishment rather than a reward, making it harder to stick with what I'm aiming to do.
Step 3: Do Something Different
Something that I've recently been doing is finding new activities to occupy my time. Rather than putting my energy into things that don't serve me, I've been trying to indulge in things that interest me and boost my creativity. For example, I've recently picked drawing back up. I've also been purchasing fashion magazines and learning more about how to put together a stylish wardrobe. By doing these things, I'm getting closer to understanding who I try am and what I enjoy.
Here are some of the magazines that I've recently purchased:
I want to encourage you to do the work that it takes to fully be your best self. That doesn't happen by avoiding the self work. The things that we go after in life can be wonderful, but who you are in the world is more important. Showing up as the most authentic version of you is what will make the biggest impact on the way you live your life and the effects it has on others.
Leave a comment below to add to the discussion!
0 comments